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I hid this post in my draft folder for months before I published it the first time.


It seemed too raw, too full of all the pain inside my mama heart to put out in the wide world for everyone to see.


And then it was time (like now) to change the flowers on the place where my son’s body rests and I couldn’t stand it anymore.


I wanted to scream at the top of my lungs, “THIS IS NOT ALL THERE IS OF MY BOY!”


I wanted to stop people on the street and make them listen to his story, to give away a piece of him for others to carry in their hearts.


My son is not a number or a statistic or only a memory.


He is integral to my story, blood of my blood and flesh of my flesh–part of my life.


I rest assured he lives in heaven with Jesus but I miss him here with me. That’s selfish, I know.  But I can’t seem to help it.


Read the rest here: You Existed, You Exist

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